The Dalles

Sometimes I wonder about the trips we take. I find out about random things and add them to the list. Like that one time we went to the middle of freaking nowhere to dig for fossils. And then last weekend, we went to The Dalles. Why? Because there is a Stonehenge replica down that way. In Maryhill, Washington. Turns out it was fitting for Memorial Day weekend—Stonehenge is a memorial for the soldiers from Klickitat who were killed in WWI. Normally I avoid any travel on holiday weekends. That whole crowd thing and all. But I took a chance that it wouldn’t be super busy down that way. I was right.

There are limited hotel options close to Stonehenge. I decided on a hotel in The Dalles, Oregon because it actually has a variety of hotels to pick from. And way more things to do around town. It’s about 20 minutes away from the memorial, easy. The weekend plan was to arrive Friday, stay in The Dalles, check out Stonehenge Saturday and nose around The Dalles, and then head to Portland Sunday for the Beverly Cleary walking tour. Things didn’t go exactly as planned thanks to a flat tire Sunday. But things started off well.

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Being a holiday weekend, I was worried about traffic. I let Blaise and Laine skip their math class Friday afternoon so we could hit the road earlier. We pulled out around 1:30pm in hopes of avoiding traffic. I wasn’t so much worried about traffic once we left the 90; I was worried about traffic through the pass heading toward Ellensburg. Luckily we only hit one slowdown, that according to Google Maps, cost us 14 minutes. And that feels about right. The pass was clear but as the road filters down from four lanes to three, and then to two lanes before Cle Elum, there was traffic. Through Ellensburg and then heading through Yakima to The Dalles, it was smooth sailing. We arrived at the hotel around 5:30pm.

After a quick check-in and unloading of the car, Brian found a place to go grab dinner. A local brewery on the Columbia River. It was family-friendly. Being a large family, we often have to wait longer for a table to accommodate us. Places often have tables for four open but not for seven. Brian called in advance and asked if they could fit a party of seven before we drove over. They could. Not even 10 minutes later we were at the restaurant and being seated. They had a band playing music indoors; we opted to sit outdoors. It was super windy and misty, but we lucked out with a table under an awning.

Saige and Baby were fans of the live music, often going back inside to watch the band play. Thankfully they didn’t play the entire time, just a song here and there. It was so loud, even outside. There’s no way you could hear anything if you were seated inside. We ordered and started the long Friday night wait for our food. Being outside and along the river, the kids and Brian went to check out the view. I was content to stay at the table. The food eventually came and we ate, and the mist stopped. This is where I’m getting old. I’m kind of over eating out. Everything is overpriced and lacks quality, and then tipping expectations are getting out of control (hello, mid-forties!). At sit-down restaurants, I’m a standard $10 tipper for anything under $50 and then 20-30% depending on all-around quality. Even at this place, I tipped 25% and it wasn’t the best service. And the food was eh. I ordered a salad, a $16 salad. Blaise had an orange cream soda; all they had was a bottled one. It was $5. And to be fair, I’d be fine paying more if I knew the workers were getting paid a living wage, not having to rely on tips. I digress.

After dinner, and a kerfuffle between Laine and Saige, we left for Shannon’s Ice Cream. A quaint little place I found online when looking for things to do in The Dalles. Laine and Saige lost their ice cream and Laine would not let this go. Saige was fine and accepted she lost out because of her behavior. I sat in the car with Laine while she was losing her shit, trying to tell her side of the story over and over (that Brian witnessed and didn’t need an explanation) while kicking and hitting the car. Parenting is fun sometimes! To be honest, I’m surprised Brian didn’t cave and let the girls get ice cream. He is the biggest pushover, always letting the kids earn back whatever privilege they’ve lost. And it’s usually a simple, if you agree not do to X again thing. But he didn’t this time. Brian took Blaise, Baby, and Maive to get the ice cream. Saige got out and sat on a bench reading a book. Who needs ice cream when you have a book?!

It was nearing 9pm by the time we made it back to the hotel. Time for swimming, but slyly. Maive was exhausted. We made the call to put her down before Brian took the older four to the hotel pool. We all pretended to go to bed so Maive would fall asleep. As soon as she was out, the older kiddos and Brian left for the pool. By now, our friends had arrived and two of her three kiddos wanted to swim also. The pool stays open until 11pm but they all called it around 10:30pm. By 11pm we were all tucked into bed.

Friday night ice cream (or no ice cream, depending on the kid) and swimming.

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It was about 7:50am Saturday morning when I looked at my watch, thinking it was probably 5:30am. Nope! Those hotel blackout curtains are amazing. The hotel stay included free breakfast, which isn’t actually free. I’m certain they calculate it into the slightly higher cost to stay versus the hotels that don’t offer free breakfast. Breakfast ended at 9am. I rallied Brian and the kids up to head down to breakfast. I’m not a breakfast eater. Brian said it worked well because the kids filtered down. Blaise and Saige weren’t ready to get up quite yet; he took Laine, Baby, and Maive down. Saige got up about 10 minutes later and went down. And then Blaise, about 20 minutes later. Everyone who wanted to eat, ate. Our friends were up earlier and ready to roll. We pulled out about 10am for Stonehenge.

Two cars, three adults, and eight kiddos, we caravanned to check out Stonehenge. It was impressive but not as impressive as I expected. Not that that’s a bad thing. I think seeing the seams where the cement was connected was a bit off-putting. But that’s just my two cents. The overall structure is cool, and I like the name plates honoring the fallen soldiers. Nice touch. And the view! The view of the Columbia River and Mount Hood was stunning. It was the prefect weather morning. Not hot, not cold; not too many clouds, but enough to make the view that much better. People could be better about picking up after their dogs, that was annoying to see dog evidence by disrespectful people. One time I was on the trail with Melvin and stopped to pick up after him. A biker rode past, slowed down, and thanked. Isn’t it the standard to pick up after your dog?! Not around here apparently, I’ve seen the evidence. And not at Stonehenge either. Ugh, some people.

Maybe 45 minutes later, we were loaded back in the two cars heading back to The Dalles. The National Neon Sign Museum was next on tap. Another random thing! Haha.

Stonehenge replica.

Overlooking the Columbia River looking west, with Mount Hood peaking up into the sky. And the view east from Stonehenge. The sign, I’ve never seen February abbreviated Feb’y.

Maive wanted to be like Laine but was a bit too small. Laine helped.

The neon sign museum is pretty cool. The museum is in an old building in downtown The Dalles (not sure The is part of the city name but I think it is?!). We bought tickets and were guided into a theater to watch a short video on how neon signs are made. The seats are so old (but well kept) that they have ash trays attached to some of the arm rests. After the video, the museum director came in and answered any questions after introducing himself. He then took us on a tour of the museum. The theater exits into an exhibit room with old lighted street signs. Between the signs are informative posters from prominent inventors relating to electricity and signage. The owner pointed out that one of the signs has errors in there, and that not many people notice them. Saige picked one out right away. Because of course she would as an avid reader. I thought it was interesting how he pointed out that the first lighted street signs were mostly one-word sings. Like lunch, drugs, hotel, etc.

Into the next room, was the beginning of neon. He was quite proud of having the first ever neon tube that was patented. We heard stories about the beginning of neon signs and how they were made then and now, and all the details surrounding neon signs. To be completely honest, I have never thought once about neon signs other than, oh look, a neon sign. Never once did I wonder about how they were made or how they were lit up, nothing. We learned about neon, argon, how to mix the colors, all that jazz. It was really interesting. We moved on to a room with several neon signs that the owner has collected over the years. He said he started when he was eight, and his collection grew over the years. Not only neon signs but signs in general, and he also commented that before leaving home, he had quite the collection of old gas pumps in his parents’ backyard. I think it’s pretty cool he took a passion that started as a kid and grew into adulthood, into a career of making neon signs and now a museum.

After touring the main rooms, he took us upstairs to a lovely space that fells like a modern-day food court but all with old-time neon signs. There’s a stage up there also, and he said they often host events. It was a really great tour and I think they kids thoroughly enjoyed themselves. Another random thing, check.

National Neon Sign Museum.

It was lunchtime. We walked a few blocks and stepped back into the ’80s at Burgerville. I had never been. It’s a fast food joint, a step up from McDonald’s and a step down from In-N-Out. But they had a Beyond burger so better than both McDonald’s and In-N-Out in my book. Although, Burger King wins the veggie patty contest with an Impossible burger. Brian ordered for the family while I sat with the kiddos. We had to take over four tables for all 11 of us to fit. Thankfully there were more than enough tables for us and other customers. The food was eh but cheaper than a sit-down restaurant. And I liked how the kids’ meals had seed packets for the toy.

After a successful lunch, it was time to head back to Shannon’s for ice cream again. Laine and Saige were going to get to experience the cute little shop, with our friends who hadn’t gone the night before. We walked the few blocks up and over to Shannon’s, only to discover they weren’t opening until 2pm. It was 1:30pm. Walking to Shannon’s we passed another old building—this one was an art canter. And it was open.

The old building is beautiful. And the landscaping, flowers galore. I love color. We walked in and up the stairs to an open space with an art gallery on one side and the other side had art and trinkets for purchase. The kids nosed around the items for sale while I looked at the gallery. Laine found this really cool journal made of recycled items. Most of the stuff they have is really cool. We bought the journal and thanked the lady for letting us visit while she handed out stickers to all the kids. She suggested we check out the downstairs on our way out.

Downstairs is as an art studio for classes. Mostly kid classes but I imagine they have adult classes? I didn’t ask. She showed us a mural from a kids camp last summer, and commented how they all worked together over the week to come up with a concept and then worked together to create the mural. I love the younger generations. Not just the generation that saved the senate at mid-terms but the even younger generation, our kiddos’ generation. Under the mural is a description of the art: FabCat is a mythical devil angel creature that lives and flies through the snowy mountain swamp and sings, “Love Yourself,” by Justin Bieber. (With also Super-Hearing and a Superman handlebar mustache. And they wear Super High-Heels and P.S. they have no gender. I cannot wait for the younger generations to take over the world.

Also downstairs they had a selection of free things for anyone to take. Stamps, pencils, art supplies, books, all sorts of good stuff. Baby and Maive each took a stamp; the other kiddos didn’t find anything worth taking. I remember back in SLO when I signed up with the women-only gym (best idea ever, to have women-only gyms), they were giving away free sneakers with registration. They offered me a free pair and I said no thank you. They couldn’t accept that I didn’t want free shoes. I mean, they were nice—I remember they were Ryka running shows—but I liked my shoes and didn’t want another pair. They were so insistent that I had to assert my no thank you a few times until they actually took no for an answer. Which, ironically, being a women-only gym, they should know no means no. Haha, just realized this now thinking back to 20ish years ago when this happened. Anyway, my kids are good about not always taking free stuff unless they’ll actually use whatever, with Maive and Baby as the exception.

The Dalles Art Center. Those flowers, so colorful and pretty.

Phew, we killed a half-hour. It was time to hit up Shannon’s at 2pm. We were selfishly hoping we’d be the first scoop of the day but another family was inside when we walked up at 2pm. Lucky them! It wasn’t long before we had 11 ice cream cones served to us, one by one. They hand make their waffle cones; mine was still warm. We sat outside on the porch and ate our cones. The kids were at a table on the other side of the entrance door while my friend and I sat on the two porch chairs. There is a neon sign in the window above the table the kids were sitting. I heard the big kids discussing if the neon sign was neon or argon, haha. Everything is a learning opportunity.

Owl carvings outside of Shannon’s Ice Cream.

Before heading back to the hotel for the kids to get their swim on, we stopped by Fred Meyer to buy goggles. Apparently the hotel pool was mostly chlorine. Their eyes were burning when swimming the night before. Buying goggles turned into a sunglass shopping spree also, with all the girls selecting a pair. Blaise wasn’t interested. I found two pairs I liked also, which I didn’t realize until I got into the car that they were the same freaking pair. Apparently I liked them that much, haha.

With goggles—and sunglasses—in hand, we were back at the hotel. All the kids readied to swim, and Brian took one for the team and got in the pool with Maive. She’s close to swimming but not there yet (hopefully by the end of summer). My friend and I sat along the pool while all the kids splashed around. Another dad came with his tween daughter, and another dad came with his toddler son. I guess it’s a dad job to swim with kids at hotel pools. They all were in the pool for over an hour before we called it good. Dinnertime was approaching.

This fun vehicle parked in the hotel lot. And more hotel swimming.

Brian and I are suckers for cheesy places. Especially restaurants. I’m not the biggest fan of going somewhere and then eating at the same restaurants we eat at all the time. Sometimes it’s all good, like if we just need to eat quickly. But if we have time and it’s all seven of us, I like new experiences. Especially eating out; it’s not common all seven of us eat out together around home. Before leaving for the trip, I found Cousins’ Restaurant and Saloon, a cheesy local restaurant (and inn) in The Dalles. It didn’t disappoint with the cheese. It’s kitschy and perfect. Again, being a large group of 11, Brian called in advance to see if they could seat us and if there would be a wait. Nope! We were five minutes away at the hotel and quickly loaded up for the short drive.

They already had the table ready for us. We walked right in and were seated amongst the decorations. Like the fake bags of potatoes the older kids told Saige it would fall on her head (ugh). There are trains and all the country decor you can imagine along the walls. We all ordered and the food came relatively fast. Somewhere in the midst of waiting for our food, Maive slid my phone down the narrowest slit where the benches we were sitting on met. It had been sitting next to my purse and sunglasses, and Maive being three, she had the bright idea to see what would happen. There was no getting my phone back without help. Our server let the manager know. We left it and figured we’d deal with it when we were all finished.

Dinner took longer than expected, but not really considering there were 11 of us. Brian had his eyes on the movie times, at the one local theater in The Dalles. The latest movie was at 7:15pm. The big kids wanted to see the latest Guardians of the Galaxy movie. Chris Pratt, no thanks. They left the restaurant at 7:10pm to head to the theater. Leaving us to finish up and deal with the phone debacle (not a dig, I’m totally fine they left). The manager was so nice, she had to basically disassemble the booth to get my phone out. She said they come apart easily in order for them to be reupholstered. But not only did she have to take off the upholstered part, she had to separate the wooden base to get my phone out. There were even cooking tongs involved. Maive! Thankfully she was kind and helpful, and said now she knows what to do if it happens again.

Cousin’s Restaurant and Saloon fun.

Back at the hotel without Brian and the big kids, the five younger kids made popcorn and watched part of a movie in our friends’ hotel room. At 8:30pm, I called it and took my three back to our hotel room to call it a day. They were all fast asleep after brushing teeth and getting jams on. I took to Reddit to entertain myself while I waited up for Brian, Blaise, and Laine to return. They were back about 10:15pm after dropping their buddy at his hotel room. Brian said the movie was really good despite Chris Pratt. He did say they’ve set it up to write him out and make way for future options. Something about how they used animals to highlight how ridiculous humans are, a statement piece. He’s suggesting I watch the movie… I’m not a movie person let alone a fan of Chris Pratt. But I do love animals. And commentaries on humanity. Maybe I’ll suck it up when it hits streaming platforms.

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Sunday morning we woke up around 7am. Brian was smart not to close the blackout curtain all the way. I mean, it would have been nice to sleep in forever, but we had Portland plans. I rallied everyone up and started the breakfast parade. It was Brian again, taking a few kids down while the others filtered down when they were ready. Checkout was at 11am and we wanted to pull out about 10am for Portland. And we did, after a stop to get gas.

The drive out of The Dalles was smooth. About 30 minutes into the drive we got a tire pressure notification. Which was weird because we had just had new tires put on the car three weeks prior. The pressure was dropping below 20psi and we were in the middle of nowhere along the Columbia River. I searched the nearest gas station which was just under 10 miles up the road; it was about the same to backtrack. Thankfully our friend was driving in front of us and we asked her to slow down to look at our tire. She said it didn’t look bad; it wasn’t flat or anything. Pressure was still dropping as we parked at a Shell gas station. As soon as we got out of the car we could hear the sound of air escaping the tire. That tire was done for. There was about a centimeter of metal sticking out of the tire. Clearly we ran over something. Easy, we’d switch out the tire with the spare. So we thought.

What a process. We’ve never had a flat other than once on my BMW before kids, which had run-flats so I had no idea. A light was on the dash but I had no idea what it was. I told Brian about it a few days later and he let me know I had been driving to and from Seattle on a flat tire for a few days. Haha. Oops. Thankfully it was fine. But this was our first flat that needed fixing ASAP, with kids, on a road trip nonetheless. Brian unloaded the back of the Suburban and started figuring out the process to change the tire. Man, they make things difficult. The spare tire is under the back of the Suburban, and a special tool is needed to access a lock in order to use another special tool to lower the spare tire. We were missing special tool #2.

It was a Sunday. Memorial Day weekend. Not much was open. After realizing we needed a special tool that we didn’t have, I started the roadside assistance app through USAA. In the meantime, our friend and Brian called local auto shops to see if they had the special tool in stock. Thank freaking goodness she stopped with us. We had said to go on to Portland without us. If she had not stopped, we would have spent another night in Oregon. Cascade Locks to be exact. USAA couldn’t get anyone to us Sunday (so much for roadside assistance). After a few calls, our friend found one at Auto Zone about 20 minutes east, backtracking from where we came. We said we’d be there soon for the tool.

Brian sent our friend and me, staying behind at Shell with all eight kids. We offered to take a few but he said nah, leave them. He’s the better parent. I would have pawned off as many kids that would fit. We made the trip to Auto Zone and it was questionable. The lady said they had the tool on the phone. We thought we were golden. When it was our turn at the register, we said who we were and the tool we needed. She remembered the call and went to the back to get the tool. She was back there for what felt like forever. Maybe five minutes? In my selfish head, I was like she knew we were coming, and she said she had checked that they had the tool, why was it not out and ready to be sold?! She walked back to the register from the back, after we heard boxes opening and being moved, and she appeared with nothing in hand. The other worker asked what she was looking for and she told him and then said, “I guess we don’t have one.” It wasn’t looking good.

After she was in the back for a few minutes, I was prepared for bad news and to stay in Oregon another night. But, as she walked back to tell us she couldn’t find one, she had a lightbulb moment and looked in a closed cabinet behind the registers. It was where they put things on hold. Sure enough, the tool was there! But it wasn’t set aside for us. Another person called last week to have it set aside but never came to buy the sucker. Thank freaking goodness. Right then and there, we opened the box to be certain it had all the things we needed. It did. We left to make the drive back to Brian and the kids at Shell.

Side note: I love technology but relying on it is becoming annoying. This may be my age showing. Not just Auto Zone, checking to see if they had the tool in stock by only looking in their database annoys me. This happened to me at Anthropologie a while ago. I was trying on dresses in the fitting room and needed a different size. The attendant asked if I needed anything, to which I said I needed the dress in a different small. (Which is another rant, no way I’m a small at my height and weight. They just size clothes different now to make women feel good about themselves. I’m a solid medium. Even as a waif of a teenager, I was a solid medium.) The attendant looked on her phone thing and said nope, they didn’t have a small. Sorry! I thanked her and got dressed. My instinct leaving was to check the rack of dresses. Guess what, they had s small in the dress I wanted. Ugh. She couldn’t walk 20 feet from the dressing room to the rack to see if they had a small, only relying on her phone thing. I know, I’m old. Next thing, I’ll start caring about our lawn.

Back at Shell with the tool in hand, Brian and the Shell attendent—who was kind to help us (and whom we gave cash for helping)—started the process to switch out the tire. I walked next door to this stand-alone burger and ice cream shop to order lunch. They had a neon sign! There was no indoor anything, only two windows outside with a handful of picnic tables. Super popular place. Our order was going to take 20-30 minutes they said. I walked back to Shell to give Brian an update and also to see what was going on with the tire. Turns out the new tool was low quality and a part that was welded on snapped off. Awesome. It was questionable if they’d be able to get the tire off with the broken tool.

Back waiting at the joint next door for our food—that took forever, like close to 40 minutes—Brian gave me the update that the tire had been switched. Nearly four hours later, we were ready to roll. Tire changed, lunch eaten, car packed back up… on the road for home. We decided to skip Portland because it was getting later in the day. And we just wanted to get home safely with the spare tire. No more hiccups. With Monday being Memorial Day and places closed. Especially anything car related. All American and whatnot.

There’s a train track behind the Shell station, and four trains went past while we were camping out on the grass. Happy kiddos!

Flat tire kiddos, hanging at Shell. And the burger joint’s neon sign.

Traffic driving home was a piece of cake, not a single slowdown. Not even by JBLM or through Tacoma. We were home around dinnertime with enough time to unpack and settle in for a quiet evening and a day of nothing on Memorial Day. We have another road trip coming up, here’s hoping there are no issues.